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Golden Globes 2012: Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie
Angelina "Ice Queen" Jolie and Brad "I've Got a Cane" Pitt at the 2012 Golden Globes. They don't look very happy, do they? | NBC

My friends and I had a blast chatting about the Golden Globes on Facebook as it aired last night. Next best thing to having a party in your living room — and no clean-up when everyone leaves!

I thought Ricky Gervais did a great job. He riffed off his controversy from last year’s Golden Globes, and the crowd riffed right back with him. Antonio Banderas even insulted him in Spanish, which got a big laugh. All in all, a fun time was had by all.

The dresses seemed pretty tame, although there was definitely a Morticia Addams theme going with lots of fish-tail hems and girls in black. I still don’t know how they walk in those mermaid hems, especially in high heels. Good thing I’m not a movie star.

Other Highlights:

Best Photo Op. Loved it when Tina Fey photo-bombed her friend Amy Poehler, slowly appearing in the frame behind her as Poehler’s name was read for Best Comedy/Musical TV Actress.

Cutest Acceptance Speech. Ludovic Bource, who won for Best Film Score for The Artist. “Right now, if I were to write a song, it would be a tap-dance number.”

Best Reading of Bedtime Stories. Oh to be a fly on the wall when Michelle Williams, winner for Best Comedy/Musical Actress award for My Week With Marilyn, read bedtime stories in a Marilyn Monroe voice to her daughter Matilda. And I just know everyone else was thinking the same thing I was thinking, especially when called Matilda brave and exuberant: I wish her dad Heath Ledger was here to watch his daughter grow up.

Golden Globes 2012: Peter Dinklage
Peter Dinklage used his spotlight to shine light on a tragedy | NBC

Best Selfless Shoutout. Peter Dinklage, during his acceptance speech for Best Supporting Actor for Game of Thrones, instructed viewers to Google Martin Henderson’s name. I bet he was the most Googled person last night. And what sort of person throws a dwarf into the air, causing serious injuries to said dwarf? It’s the kind of thing that lessens my faith in humanity.

Best Speech Without Her Glasses. Meryl Streep. And for the record, she doesn’t need her glasses. She always gives great acceptance speeches off the cuff.

Best Singing Presenters. Husband and wife William H. Macy and Felicity Huffman, who sang their intro for Best Supporting Actress in a Series/Miniseries/TV Movie. Those two are just adorable. Here it is: “These actresses did stunning work, heartbreaking true and bold/Though four will go home empty-handed, one will take home gold. Don’t be humiliated, cuz you all did a terrific job/It’s an honor to be nominated…” Then they paused, looked at each other, and offered: “Blah-blah-blah-blah-blah-blah-blah.”

Best Trash Talk. After Ricky Gervais intro’d Madonna with, “She’s just … like a virgin,” the pop star came onstage and replied, “If I’m just like a virgin, then why don’t you come over here and do something about it? I haven’t kissed a girl in years… on TV.” And that’s when we saw Gervais scuttle across the stage behind her.

Golden Globes 2012: Madonna, Ricky Gervais and George Clooney all scored laughs | NBC
Golden Globes 2012: Madonna, Ricky Gervais and George Clooney all scored laughs | NBC

Best Image to Erase From Your Head. Morgan Freeman. In a bathtub. No, it’s not a Clue reference. It’s the vision of the Cecil B. DeMille winner as a bare-chested Dracula scrubbing himself while sitting in a coffin in an early clip from The Electric Company. “I love to take a bath in a casket/A casket, a casket is the thing/ I love to take a bath in a casket/In a casket you will never leave a ring!” Please, Lord, erase the image from my brain.

Classiest Non-Classy Penis Joke. Is it in bad taste when George Clooney makes a penis joke (of which there were many during the show)? During his acceptance for Best Actor for The Descendants, Mr. Movie Star cracked, “I’d like to thank Michael Fassbender [fellow nominee for Shame] for taking over the frontal-nudity responsibility that I had. Hey Michael, honestly, if you can play golf like this, with your hands behind your back [as he mimes what can only be described as an anatomical golf club], go for it, man. Do it.”

Sweetest Inspirational Speech. When trembling Octavia Spencer won for her supporting role in The Help, honoring domestics with a quote from Martin Luther King, Jr.: “All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity and importance.”

Best Upstaging by a Dog. From Uggie the Jack Russell terrier in The Artist, winner of Best Musical or Comedy. Uggie did some adorable little stunts before producer Thomas Langmann gave a heartfelt tribute to his late father Claude Berri, who received an Oscar for his short film Le Poulet in 1966, but lacked the money to travel to Hollywood to receive the award.

Golden Globes 2012: Uggie the Dog
Uggie the Dog from The Artist: Just Another Day in Hollywood | NBC

Most Loving Teasing. George Clooney ambling across the stage with Brad Pitt’s cane (he injured his knee), joking, “I have to give it back to him. He can’t make it back to the bar otherwise.”

Here’s the list of the winners:

MOTION PICTURES
Picture, Drama: The Descendants
Picture, Musical or Comedy: The Artist
Actor, Drama: George Clooney, The Descendants
Actress, Drama: Meryl Streep, The Iron Lady
Director: Martin Scorsese, Hugo
Actor, Musical or Comedy: Jean Dujardin, The Artist
Actress, Musical or Comedy: Michelle Williams, My Week With Marilyn
Supporting Actor: Christopher Plummer, Beginners
Supporting Actress: Octavia Spencer, The Help
Foreign Language: A Separation
Animated Film: The Adventures of Tintin
Screenplay: Woody Allen, Midnight in Paris
Original Score: Ludovic Bource, The Artist
Original Song: Masterpiece (music and lyrics by Madonna, Julie Frost, Jimmy Harry), W.E.

TELEVISION
Series, Drama: Homeland, Showtime
Series, Musical or Comedy: Modern Family, ABC
Actor, Drama: Kelsey Grammer, Boss
Actress, Drama: Claire Danes, Homeland
Actress, Musical or Comedy: Laura Dern, Enlightened
Actor, Musical or Comedy: Matt LeBlanc, Episodes
Miniseries or Movie: Downton Abbey (Masterpiece), PBS
Actress, Miniseries or Movie: Kate Winslet, Mildred Pierce
Actor, Miniseries or Movie: Idris Elba, Luther
Supporting Actress, Series, Miniseries or Movie: Jessica Lange, American Horror Story
Supporting Actor, Series, Miniseries or Movie: Peter Dinklage, Game of Thrones

CECIL B. DEMILLE LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD
Morgan Freeman

A Few of My Favorite Dresses:

Golden Globes 2012: Sarah Michelle Gellar
I wasn't sure about this tie-dyed gown on Sarah Michelle Gellar, but when she said her daughter picked it out, I fell in love | NBC
Golden Globes 2012: Octavia Spencer in Gorgeous Lavender | NBC
The Help's Octavia Spencer in Gorgeous Lavender | NBC
Golden Globes: Claire Danes in Black and White | NBC
Homeland's Claire Danes in Lovely Black and White | NBC
Golden Globes 2012: Sofia Vergara rocking the fish-tail
Modern Family's Sofia Vergara Rocks the Fish-Tail | NBC

9 COMMENTS

  1. I’m a sucker for awards shows and often appreciate the speeches from non-U.S. citizens the most, since I’m a sucker for an accent too. Agree with all you said here — except that Sarah Michelle Geller dress. Doesn’t work for me.

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