Wrath of the Titans: Titanic Mediocrity

Wrath of the Titans

Wrath of the Titans is the sequel to 2010’s [amazon_link id=”B00475BUVM” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Clash of the Titans[/amazon_link], which was a remake of the 1981 movie also called [amazon_link id=”B002ZD3V10″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Clash of the Titans[/amazon_link]. The 2010 Clash of the Titans film came out right at the return of the 3D craze that swept across Hollywood after Avatar made billions and coincidentally also offered 3D. The short of it is that Clash of the Titans was a quick cash-in to get a big chunk of that 3D money. It turns out that Wrath of the Titans is exactly the same thing. Except now you need a lot more than just having three dimensions to make a good movie.

Wrath of the Titans
Now where did I put that plot again?

Wrath of the Titans takes place ten years after Clash of the Titans. Greek hero Perseus (Sam Worthington) has become a fisherman and is enjoying his retirement after killing the Kraken in the last movie. It would make sense that the fishing industry would boom without fishermen having to worry about being killed by an aquatic monstrosity. Unfortunately, we are robbed of the chance to watch Perseus catch bass and snappers by the sudden arrival of Zeus (Liam Neeson).

Zeus tells Perseus that the power of the underworld prison of Tartarus is weakening and the titans will soon escape. Despite the end of times being a pretty bad thing, Perseus turns Zeus down so he can resume his own personal oblivion of the joy of fishing. Needless to say, the titans escape and eventually Perseus is forced to kill them in the manliest fashion he can think of.

My description of the plot is actually more interesting than anything the film itself can come up with. The plot is pretty much only there at all for the handful of people that actually care why Perseus is killing everything. The story is nothing new, and the whole film is merely a series of fights and military bravado. Perseus is an uninteresting character and has as much personality as the various monsters he fights. Every character in the film is visually three dimensional but literarily one dimensional. There isn’t any reason to care about any of these characters, and none of them have any kind of chemistry or witty dialogue.

Wrath of the Titans
Someone … please … get me out of this movie …

The closest the film comes to having personality are the characters of Agenor (Toby Kebbell) and the god Hephaestus (Bill Nighy), who are comic relief characters. However, all of their shenanigans and goofy dialogue are only present so Perseus can chastise them and not have time for their nonsense. Almost every character has a family member they want to protect or kill, and the film uses this as a lazy attempt to create concern from the audience in lieu of good acting or smart writing.

I saw the film in 3D because that was the only format my theatre was showing when I arrived. I imagine the regular version of the film is just as mediocre but with less boulders and weapons flying out of the screen. Perhaps the worst thing about the film is that it is so forgettable. Nothing about it is especially different or unique, and in a year or two I won’t even remember that I saw it. The difference between you and me is that you can save some money and not see it at all and still have that same experience in a few years of forgetting this film even existed.

Comments

  1. Karyn18 Avatar
    Karyn18

    Another beautiful film to watch for! And I am so excited for this film.. Thanks for sharing some video clips as well as your movie review!

  2. Mike Avatar
    Mike

    “Titanic Mediocrity” — nice headline, pretty much sums it up.

  3. Holly Avatar

    Thanks for saving us the time and money on this one. Sorry though that you had to sit through it yourself. Was the popcorn at least good?

  4. Katherine Avatar

    Good to know. I may need to reference this in movie discussions/negotiations with my husband.

  5. Vestuviu Planavimas Avatar
    Vestuviu Planavimas

    I really doubt that Wrath of the Titans will be able to cash in like Clash of Titans did. There was a trend of 3D movies after Avatar, but that’s not the case anymore. Unless the story is good, Wrath of the Titans won’t capture the market.

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